‘A family that talks is a healthy family’
EFFECTIVE communication is the foundation of a strong and healthy family, said an Islamic Da’wah Centre officer recently.
Ustaz Hj Mail Hj Basar said poor communication can lead to numerous family problems such as excessive family conflict, ineffective problem solving, lack of intimacy and weak emotional bonds.
“In this era of modern technology, there is a clear sign of neglect in what it means to have family interaction. Young and old, we are engrossed with modern gadgets up to the point where we forget the people in front of us,” he said.
Ustaz Hj Mail was speaking on the sidelines during the hand over ceremony for orphans on Sunday at the Sengkurong Community Hall.
He reminded Bruneians to interact more with their family, adding that parents should also expose and introduce their children to their extended families and relatives who they seldom meet.
“This is because when you have problems in the future, you will know that you are not living on an island alone. You have family who can stay with you through thick and thin,” said the ustaz.
He noted there are cases of neglect within the family, which can affect the social equilibrium of the society.
“Families are like the pillars of society. If it is destroyed, so will the entire society,” he said.
“There will be chaos and conflict due to the lack of intimacy. Everyone will be a stranger,” he explained.
Ustaz Hj Mail noted that present day youth are not used to visiting their relatives.
“In the past, I used to visit my neighbours because they are uncles and aunties. It was easier to go from one house to another,” he said.
“However, children now have the Internet and computers. They spend too much of their time on the virtual world. They do not look left or right to communicate with the person sitting next to them during family gatherings. This can be a problem,” said the ustaz.
Ustaz Hj Mail stressed that weak emotional bonds can also lead to solitude and stress.
“When the person has no one to talk to, they will resort to the Internet and look for the company of strangers,” he said.
“They will perceive their own family members as strangers and strangers as family members.”
The ustaz then cited a hadith that states, ‘when Muslims ignore and neglect their relatives or family members for more than three days, they will not be able to enter heaven’.
With this in mind, Ustaz Hj Mail urged Bruneians to continue to foster and strengthen their family ties during the month of Ramadhan.
The Brunei Times